Jaguars Junction: Week 6

Last week, when the Jacksonville Jaguars played the Philadelphia Eagles in London U.K., I devised a typically great "bit." My idea was to write a piece casting Philadelphians as clumsy oafs, juxtaposed with Jacksonvilleans, who would be portrayed as urbane sophisticates. The essay was to start with a dramatic scene of a Philadelphia resident in London, behaving as the proverbial bull in a China shop, demanding: "DUHH ... ME WANT MEAT SANDWICH!" As the poor Pennsylvanian proved himself a rube, the Jacksonville resident, dressed in a rakish Savile Row suit, would shrug apologetically and, with a smattering of cosmopolitan remarks, assure his London host that not all Americans are so painfully uncultured. As the Jacksonville man, pausing only to refill his pipe, won over the room with a series of digressions on the legacy of the East India Company, wandering Philadelphians would periodically interject:

Read it at Defector ↗

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